August in 2 more days :)

Bear with me, I have been feeling under the weather for the past two weeks, bb passed all the virus to me, coughing into my face while I was sleeping soundly in the middle of the night and I still went to work despite that, I finally crashed last Fri, doctor need me to seriously stayed at home to rest but naughty me went out to club on Sat at Rebel.

Gosh, I am seriously getting on in age, the crowds there, all the youngsters probably 5years younger than me, I feel so old. 😦

Bb supposed to have some in camp training this week, but the greatest news delighted us, cause it was known to him on his first day that firstly he do not have to stay in and secondly is a 8-12pm everyday affair. 🙂 I saved the hassles of moving back home for few days.

Burp.! We just had dinner with my parents and I am so bloated and fortunate to have my mum cooking bird nest for us.

I shall go glue myself to Burning Flame 3 drama while bb is going downstairs for coffee talk cock session with buddy.

Ciao and take care 🙂 I am meeting girlfriend tml in town for hot sizzling gossips and shopping. Weekend 2 more days, and it will be August. I LOVE AUGUST, my birthday and bb birthday just 1 day apart, *anticipating excitedly*

Love.

Relationship in therapy

” No relationship exactly leaves us who we were before.
A person who has been hurt by a bad relationship yearns for the  healing power of a good one but is cynical about experiencing it”

Where is the love

I have been short tempered recently, nit picking on every small possible matter and flare it up, and I am tired, and is affecting every one around me.I tried to supress it and not make a mole hill out of nothing but always I ended up feeling angry and crying to sleep.

Every incident that is happening recently around me only add on to my skeptism, I wish there is someone who can listen to me and not judge me.

I miss my friends.

I think I having a mild case of depression.

I know of this girl,

who came from an unhappy case of parent’s marriage,who never celebrate her birthday with them in her entire life, she envies friends who go out for birthday dinner with their family members, she grew up in the hands of caregiver while her parents are out slogging at work, her caregiver locked her in a dark room, she cried and pounced on the door pleading for help, nobody opened the door for her, she cried helplessly at the stairway pleading for her mum not to go to work when all she saw was the saddening eyes of her mum, she grew up feeling scared of her own house with different strangers lingering around in and out as the years passed. To her, is only a house and not a home.

Her first boyfriend dumped her for another woman, her 2nd one dumped her as well, due to parental objection. Every time when she put in her heart and soul in a man, either she got cheated emotionally or physically. She resorted to pain when she was still not legal of age to boozing, she loved cutting herself, pain gave her happiness. When she was 18, she resorted to abusive drinking, cause to her, she thinks that the whole world love her. She swore never to get married, she won’t never trust men again, they are just bastards who are out to cheat her.

Just when she thought she gave up all hopes, she met this man, right from the very first day, she knew she is in love with him, cases of unhappy moments with men ceased, she found happiness, she is happy and she proudly told herself she wants to be this man’s wife. She don’t mind his past, she just wants to be with him.

But now she is tired again.

She wishes things were much simpler than before.

:(

I.am.not.happy.every.single.day